OM by Margarethe

"after I drew it, I scanned it and printed it double-sided, cut it out and hung it over the dining room table, a sweet little reminder......"     Margarethe

Vulnerability, Shame and Self-Acceptance

Kristin was featured on a radio program called "Voices in the Family" along with Brene Brown.
It was good to hear her gentle but firm voice answering the questions on the issues of self-compassion. If you'd like to listen, click here Vulnerability, Shame and Self-Acceptance

Mary Oliver, Wild Geese

You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
for a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
      love what it loves.
Tell me about despair, yours and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile the world goes on.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain
are moving across the landscapes,
over the prairies and the deep trees,
the mountains and the rivers.
Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,
are heading home again.
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting---
over and over announcing your place
in the family of things.

Mary Oliver

couldn't find a better picture in clean blue air.. :(

Mary Oliver, The Journey

The Journey

One day you finally knew

what you had to do, and began,

though the voices around you

kept shouting

their bad advice --

though the whole house

began to tremble

and you felt the old tug

at your ankles.

"Mend my life!"

each voice cried.

But you didn't stop.

You knew what you had to do,

though the wind pried

with its stiff fingers

at the very foundations,

though their melancholy

was terrible.

It was already late

enough, and a wild night,

and the road full of fallen

branches and stones.

But little by little,

as you left their voices behind,

the stars began to burn

through the sheets of clouds,

and there was a new voice

which you slowly

recognized as your own,

that kept you company

as you strode deeper and deeper

into the world,

determined to do

the only thing you could do --

determined to save

the only life you could save.

~ Mary Oliver ~

labyrinth at kripalu..

the path was covered by bushes and wildflowers..

made me wonder if i'm on the right path..

sometimes you just have to trust that the path you're on will lead you to the center..

where your deepest self meets an invitation of the universe..

loving kindness meditation for beginners

On Chris' website I found a series of guided meditations. 

At the training I recognized that both Kristin and Chris' voices and tones carry such a soothing quality which makes a guided meditation easy to focus and follow. 

So I downloaded several of them and first practiced Loving Kindness for Beginners. 

It was very calming and I have to say quite delightful!

Listening to and be guided by his voice certainly brought me back the memories of the room at Kripalu.

I tried to upload it on this page, but there's a problem with uploading.

If you are interested in, click here Loving Kindness Meditation for Beginners. 

(from Dr. Christopher Germer's website www.mindfulselfcompassion.org)

vulnerability is..

vulnerability is..
core of shame, fear, struggle for worthiness..

at the same time..
birth place of joy, belonging, creativity, love..

Brene Brown

she's good..

her book "the gifts of imperfection" was an eyeopener to my concepts of shame and vulnerability..

in fact, i got to know of Kristen through her book..

now i'm a huge fan of them both..

there is power and strength.. 
in embracing vulnerability..

soften, soothe, allow

soften, soothe, allow has been my meditation practice over the last few weeks.
i went to Kristin's website and used her guided meditation.
at first i had a hard time touching my difficult emotions settled in my belly and throat.
i had a feeling that i want to be comforted
but at the same time i resisted the comfort offered by myself.
i actually felt anger coming from the back of my head
when i thought of softening the emotions
i even fell asleep in the middle of it several times
it was strange..
but i continued this meditation anyway
hoping to release the tension and gain some insight.
a couple of days ago
while i was in meditation
i was able to go back to the time that i first had this symptom
and identify what the emotions were.
guilt and shame..
it was hard to face them..
then i remembered..this is a moment of suffering..
so i repeated the meditation again
that's when i was able to feel the pain from the emotions
and actually soften, soothe and allow..
that time i found especially 'allow' part very powerful..
as much as they are difficult to handle
i recognized that they have been serving a purpose to maintain my equilibrium
so the idea of not getting rid of them completely was actually comforting.
i still practice this meditation at least once a day
and was able to soften and soothe little bit more..
i even gave the guided meditation information to one of my colleagues and a friend in Korea..
now they are practicing it..
i feel like more people need to know about it..
i don't know about you..
but i found this week more challenging than last week. 
it could be just because of heat..
but i bet i'm running out of juice..
i need to remember to breathe..to soften, soothe and allow..
inhale..exhale..inhale..exhale..hah~~

i did a pleasure walk yesterday..it was beautiful at Avery Point.. 

Mindful Self-Compassion at Kripalu

It was a transforming experience to be part of Mindful Self-Compassion(MSC) Training at Kripalu in June. Our teachers, Dr. Kristin Neff & Dr. Christopher Germer offered not only the knowledge but also a great example of mindful self-compassion. Their insights and skills in leading the group through much difficult issues  were tremendously helpful. They created a sacred space through their non-judgmental and non-anxious presence. 


The participants were also amazing. I've never been with a group of people that much self-reflective and humble. (I have to admit that I was intimidated at the first session after I found out that I'll be with a room-full of therapists for a whole week!) But as time went by over and over again, we found that we are sharing common humanity and we formed such an intimate circle of friendship (like a family, of course a healthy one!). We could recognize the changes that happened internally through the week-long training. 


Coming back home was difficult anticipating that our life will discourage us from practicing mindful self-compassion even though we now have many tools to utilize. Our hope that comforted us was that we'll somehow stay connected and encourage one another to continue to practice mindful self-compassion. Several of us at the Fire Ceremony on Thursday night discussed about making an effort to create a web space for us to share our thoughts and experiences, learning and challenges after our training. And here it is! I will add the email addresses that I have to the setting so that everyone on the list can upload her/his postings. Simply click "New Post" on the upper right corner. Or leave a comment by clicking "Comment" on the bottom of each posting. I hope this will serve the purpose of staying connected and continuing our practice of mindful self compassion. (by the way, I'm Ho-Soon! :)